I have been dating myself every valentine’s since the beginning of time. LOLjk. I recently watched Jollibee’s valentine special short film and reminded of the number of times I dated myself during valentine’s week. Here’s the link of that commercial/short film by Jollibee. Sorry for spoiling you. 😛
If you ended your relationship just before the love month (nice timing) or haven’t found the one you may consider dating yourself. When my friends heard that I consistently date myself they wonder how I do that because they feel like walking around or eating out alone are not something they’d want to do. But, to be honest, it is one of the things I look forward every month. Dating yourself is like dating someone but with this set up you get to know more about yourself. You will have time to evaluate and reevaluate your life – past mistakes, achievements, challenges and opportunities. Aside from that, you get to go to places and eat foods you want without using extra energy considering your date’s wants. So, whether it is your first or nth time celebrating the love month alone, I hope you will have a well-spent Valentine’s Day.
I used to be that shy type girl in class not because I was born this way but because the society told me to. My environment’s standard of beauty is having clear skin, pointy nose, on-fleek brows and almond eyes and because of that I thought I was not beautiful. Insecurities swallowed me whole back then and I thought I’d never gonna conquer the monster.
Growing up, people would say that beauty is subjective and I did not know that the day would come that I’d agree to that. Before going to how I redeemed my confidence back, let me share to you these words from Emily McDowell, “‘Finding yourself’ is not really how it works. You aren’t a ten-dollar bill in last winter’s coat pocket. You are also not lost. Your true self is right there, buried under cultural conditioning, other people’s opinions, and inaccurate conclusions you drew as a kid that became your beliefs about who you are. ‘Finding yourself’ is actually returning to yourself. An unlearning, an excavation, a remembering who you were before the world got its hands on you.”. This quote may seem not appropriate as it looks like a quote for finding yourself but here’s the tea for those still in deep pit of self-doubt – gaining back your confidence is to find your true self first.
To be able to conquer your insecurities in your society’s standard you have to go back to yourself before they got you. One of the things I did is to go out of that society I grew up – I traveled. My younger self knows that my first few travels were for leisure and pictures purposes. But, as I wander from one point to another, I was able to see life in a broader perspective. Travelling will allow us to learn and relearn things, to discover people living way differently but still function and not hate themselves. The challenges along the way will unleash potentials and skill you didn’t know you have.
Boracay may be beautiful to you but not to your friend. Mt. Pulag is worth the trek for others but to you it was a usual mountain climbing experience. Durian is probably comfort food to others but not to you. You see, travelling to a place far away from your home town is life changing. It is a subtle way of stabbing your insecurity monster and finally living out the life you’d always wanted. That experience made me see myself and others being equally beautiful in our own different ways. And if ever you are reading this thinking you are not beautiful enough for this world, you are wrong – rediscover yourself and find that you are more than enough to deserve all the best this life has to offer. *wink*
Have you ever had a goal in mind you really want to achieve but none went your way and end up getting frustrated because the universe seems to be not on your side? I guess we all have moments like that especially when we figured out after n years of living what we really want in life. Do not give up and be patient. Keep doing what your gut is telling you. Let me tell you a story about the love-hate relationship between a person I know and the universe and I hope this will inspire you to not give up on your bucket list.
This person was not born with a golden spoon in her mouth. But she had dreams you will think way too impossible given her family’s financial status. Nonetheless, she kept working hard. She had faith but just like the others, we sometimes get weak and ask if dreaming is just a waste of time. There was this time she told her self to just live in her simple comfort zone. However, her gut was telling her otherwise. She wanted to persevere amidst the things life had been throwing to her. There were a lot of times she considered giving up and wonder why this was not what the universe wanted for her.
And then one day, after years of waiting the universe conspired for her dreams to come true. It was scary because all her life she thought the universe hates her for being too ambitious and all of a sudden everything went smoothly towards what she wanted badly. Yes. She achieved what her mind conceived not a day after she had set her goals not even a year later but in time she did thru years of hardworking and praying.
Some people might get what they want in an instant others do not. We all have different timelines and the universe knows when is the best time. Never give up on your goals. Listen to your gut and keep working and praying. One day the universe will surprise you and conspire and when that time comes, go with it. You are limitless.
Are you one of those who said that 2020 will be the year you are going to achieve your goals? Because I did. Before 2019 ends, I looked back and realized that I have been delaying my long term goals for instant gratification. I told myself that I am gonna work harder. Then 2020 started and I was very motivated to exert extra effort for the universe to conspire for my dreams. But then COVID happened and everything has become uncertain up until to this writing.
Is it still worth it to start pursuing our dreams in time of Covid19? Can we still cross out one of those goals in our bucket list? Why do we need to work for our dreams if tomorrow is full of uncertainties? Can we postpone achieving or even setting our goals? Is it still okay to dream?
With the new variant of the virus, another level of anxiety may arise (or has arose in some places). The world hasn’t healed well from the original variant and now we are facing a more contagious one. We couldn’t blame people from getting scared about the future. And it is okay if you have decided to create a list of your 2021 goals. It is okay if you aim to achieve those this year because you know what they say? Nothing is impossible. But, remember, it is also okay to hold back if you think you are not yet ready; prolly the time for you to rest your mind, body and soul, and once you get that energy, you will be ready to put that game face on. It is okay to start your dreams now, tomorrow, the next day or until the world stabilise. Whatever you are comfortable with, dream on.
Dreaming during a pandemic is difficult. At the moment, we can still dream, work for them to become reality or just write them down. As we wait and hope for a brighter light, let’s help one another. Let us follow the protocols our place has put to prevent the spread of the virus. Wear mask, wash hands frequently, and stay home if you do not have any urgent matter to attend to. Stay safe, dreamers!
I have been some of my friends’ confidant with their relationships’ ups and downs. Sometimes I ask myself why me? I have been single since the beginning of time (LOL) so where will I get the words of wisdom they need? 😀
It has been years since the first friend of mine shared her fairytale that did not end into a happily ever after, then months after another friend had the same dilemma until I lost count. Looking back, I realised how immature I was before than now. I used to tell my friends who kept going back to their exes how stupid they are. But as time goes by, I have realised that my friends do not really need my advice – they know the answer, their guts are shouting if they should either stay or leave the relationship. You are what they need – someone who will listen and not judge them. Advise them if you see something is clearly wrong on what they are doing, and if they do not listen, please stay and try again.
There are times you will feel like you are repeating yourself – same advice different person. I hope you never get tired lending your ears and arms. Embrace it. Learn from it.
If you are like me who constantly receives good and bad love life news…may you feel blessed with all those souls willing to give you a part of it.
To all my friends who loved before, sorry for judging your decisions. I will try my best to become a better person and look at as many sides of the story as possible before drawing conclusions. Thank you for sharing an important part of your life. Whatever you decide may you find the happiness you deserve. And to those who got broken, may you heal well, and grow into a person your past and present self would be proud of. I pray that all of you find your right person in the right time and place. As you journey to meeting Mr/Ms Right, remember that my line is always there for you (just needs a couple of wave before answering. LOLjk).
Are you also struggling to find a gift for your brother, boyfriend or husband? Let’s admit it, finding gifts for her is relatively easier than for him. I know the stress because I have been living in a household dominated with guys so here I listed some gift ideas you can give:
One of the best travels I had was when we went to South Korea. Aside from their plausible films and music, the place has a lot to offer. I listed my fave places I’ll never get tired visiting below:
Garden of Morning Calm
An aboretum located at the east of Seoul housing different species of plants. I am a fan of all kinds of flowers and plants – they calm my soul. A must include spot to your itinerary.
Rose theme garden of Seoul Grand Park
Did I just say I love flowers? Nothing much to explain why this one is on the list. Here’s the story: this place was not in our itinerary that time (originally, it was a place with tulips but we learned that the flower was not in season during that time), but I badly wanted to go to a place with lots of flowers and Google brought us here!!! One of the best unplanned place.
I am a big fan of the TV series Jewel in the Palace that I watched it twice despite the length of the film. LOL. Therefore, this one was a must visit for me. And when I was there I realised the place was too big and one visit won’t be enough. I’ll definitely go here again and again wondering and imagining the events that happened in the place during the old time.
I always look for a new food from a new place. The perfect place? Gwangjang Market! The market has a lot of food to choose from that one tummy is not enough. Hence, you’ll definitely plan to visit this one again. We even visited this twice to eat our favorite fried soybean.
I just hope we can all travel again to visit our favorite places. 🙂
This is not a commercial for rubber shoes. But, if you are looking for a sign whether to create your YouTube channel or not right now, then you are in the right place. I am telling you, sign up NOW and UPLOAD the content you’ve been thinking of for days. Even science will tell you to listen to your gut. Watch the video below:
Life is too short to waste your years thinking about all the uncertainties. You are 20 right now but in a snap you will be in your 30s, 40s, 50s, 60, 70s, and find yourself asking what did I do with all the time I had? Regrets usually come from the things we did not do, not on what we did.
There are moments when an idea suddenly comes and you just want to jump in but then doubt and fear will try to pull you back. Most of the time we give in to these weaknesses we all have. It’s fine to have a little hesitation, move a step backward and weigh the pros and cons. And, if you think you are not hurting anybody, then do what you want to do. Do not think of what other people might say to your decisions, besides the choices you make today will determine who you will be tomorrow. Regardless of the outcome, at the end of the day the lesson/s you learned will allow you to grow.
I know we are still in the middle of a pandemic but when everything becomes ok consider traveling. Here are the 3 reasons why you should start exploring different places.
1. Say hi to new people
Growing with the same people is not bad but meeting new people is during your travel is a different topic. Below is the talk of Christa Awuor about going out and meeting new people.
I am telling you, getting to know new people during your travel is life changing. New souls from new places are gifts for our well-being.
2. Open your mind
Are you thinking of someone right now with a belief way different from yours? Sometimes you disagree with them but other times you will get into thinking that person has a point. Traveling is one of the bet ways to understand life further.
As you travel you will see different people, culture, beliefs and food (my fave part) that may be way different from yours and this will open up your mind on the diversity of life. Go out and explore.
3. Learn more about yourself
A lot of times we think we know ourselves fully. But wait until you travel from places to places. In each place you go, facing challenges and opportunities is inevitable. However, they are good parts of your travel as you learn things you did not know you are capable.
As you go home safely from a place you’ll realise you learn something new about your self and you are not the same person before your travel. Allow traveling to help you grow into a better person.