I used to be that shy type girl in class not because I was born this way but because the society told me to. My environment’s standard of beauty is having clear skin, pointy nose, on-fleek brows and almond eyes and because of that I thought I was not beautiful. Insecurities swallowed me whole back then and I thought I’d never gonna conquer the monster.
Growing up, people would say that beauty is subjective and I did not know that the day would come that I’d agree to that. Before going to how I redeemed my confidence back, let me share to you these words from Emily McDowell, “‘Finding yourself’ is not really how it works. You aren’t a ten-dollar bill in last winter’s coat pocket. You are also not lost. Your true self is right there, buried under cultural conditioning, other people’s opinions, and inaccurate conclusions you drew as a kid that became your beliefs about who you are. ‘Finding yourself’ is actually returning to yourself. An unlearning, an excavation, a remembering who you were before the world got its hands on you.”. This quote may seem not appropriate as it looks like a quote for finding yourself but here’s the tea for those still in deep pit of self-doubt – gaining back your confidence is to find your true self first.
To be able to conquer your insecurities in your society’s standard you have to go back to yourself before they got you. One of the things I did is to go out of that society I grew up – I traveled. My younger self knows that my first few travels were for leisure and pictures purposes. But, as I wander from one point to another, I was able to see life in a broader perspective. Travelling will allow us to learn and relearn things, to discover people living way differently but still function and not hate themselves. The challenges along the way will unleash potentials and skill you didn’t know you have.
Boracay may be beautiful to you but not to your friend. Mt. Pulag is worth the trek for others but to you it was a usual mountain climbing experience. Durian is probably comfort food to others but not to you. You see, travelling to a place far away from your home town is life changing. It is a subtle way of stabbing your insecurity monster and finally living out the life you’d always wanted. That experience made me see myself and others being equally beautiful in our own different ways. And if ever you are reading this thinking you are not beautiful enough for this world, you are wrong – rediscover yourself and find that you are more than enough to deserve all the best this life has to offer. *wink*